Home Again...

OK I know I have been out of pocket for some time, well 8 days to be exact, but all is well and I am once again safe and sound back at BIAP (Baghdad International AirPort). I was away on a mission and as you know from the last time I try to keep it quiet till I get back, not just for the sake of my family, because I generally don't have a lot of good things to talk about, but also for my safety and those I was traveling with. Things are really getting out of hand out here and I am really trying hard not to let it get to me, but it is hard to do, I mean I am only human. I had seriously thought about staying until March or April of next year, but I am beginning to think that they may be pushing it a bit. Lord knows that I thank him everyday for what he has done in my life and the many, many blessing he has bestowed upon me. I am forever grateful for the experience and the chance to enrich my life and I am constantly thinking to myself "how in the world can I ever repay him...?"

I CAN'T...

What he has given me in my short thirty years is more than I could pay back in 100 lifetimes. I will never in a million years ever say anything other than I am blessed to be alive right now. Death, destruction and mayhem is all around me and though it all I still live. It reminds me of a time when I loss my uncle (my stepmothers brother) and he was only 19 at the time. I had nothing going for me I had no job, I wasn’t a bad kid (and yes I was a kid at 19) but I had made some stupid decisions and it cost me. Well he had a good job going for him and had three children and everybody loved him. Well he was on the wrong side of the law as well, only he was on the side that got you killed, and despite my many warnings to my father they never manifested themselves until he was arrested for having a shotgun in his trunk. Two years later he is gunned down in front of his girlfriend’s house. I can remember sitting on the back pew of the church and asking GOD why did he let that happen to him when there were so many that relied on him. There were going to be three more fatherless children in a world where one is too many. Why when he was doing something with his life did he have to die, why not me...!!!



It took a while, but I finally got my answer....

I have things that need to be done and although I am not the father of children now I will be one day... There has been a few other times where I have thought GOD had forsaken me and I am sure many have, but once I realized that he is not to blame for my own mistakes I really had no one else to blame. So I sucked it up, became a man and took my mistakes for what they really were, a life lesson.

As a boy growing up you look up to the men in your life and say to yourself I cant wait to be just like them, but what you soon find out is being a man is not only hard work, but you never fully stop becoming a man. At almost thirty I am more man than I was last year, and 10 times the man I thought I was. Age has nothing to do with being a man and if most boys knew that it take a lot of life lessons and many more years that just 18 to be a respectable man. Like I said a few weeks ago, "The more I know, the more I realize the less I know..." Like I can remember when my aunt's and my Grams told me to note everything I do, cause you never know when you are going to need it. How true they are and although I haven’t done it in the most conventional way as my aunt's Ka Ka and Cine would have liked, the internet is an amazing thing. My Website has been a logbook for all the things that have been going on with me, personally, work related and just everyday life. Because of this wonderful tool I have a leg to stand on if I ever need to fall back on it in response to the last post I made.

Thank you for helping me to become the man I am... Each and everyone of you that played your part the list is long so I wont go into details, but you know who you are and just as I have a debt to GOD, I also carry with it my debt to you...


Love is a powerful thing....

I am so glad I have that power within me...

K